A possie in Aussie

April 26, 2009

Boat people ‘twisted and warped by their boatish ways’

Filed under: asylum,asylum seeker,refugee — Nayano @ 7:43 am
Tags: , , ,

Ben Pobjie at New Matilda writes this funny, funny stuff about “boat people”:

… these are not ordinary people, but “boatpeople”. And boatpeople are different from you and I, twisted and warped by their boatish ways. Often, after many weeks at sea, boat people become more boat than person, which is a disaster waiting to happen should they be allowed on land among real people. Can boatpeople and actual people ever really get along? Perhaps in utopia, but in the real world, it may well be that the best we can do is isolate boatpeople, in order to study them.

For an example of the problems raised by boatpeople, look at the way that, during the Howard years, they kept on sewing their lips together. Horrible, wasn’t it? Aren’t you glad they were locked up safely before they began enacting these bizarre customs? Had they been allowed into the community, who knows what they might have sewn together next? Who can predict the bizarre destruction of the boat-folk? Unless you want to wake up one day with your head stitched to your shoulder and the oppressive smell of falafel all through your house, you should be grateful for those detention camps.

Which is why, of course, it’s so worrying that these boats are once more becoming a flood, a torrent of leaky wood and metal threatening to sink us all in a swelling ocean of sweaty caftans and wiry beards. Why, only this year there have been six boats making their way to Australia, with a seventh now spotted and an eighth believed to be on its way. Should the number reach nine, it will, according to the Constitution, officially put Australia into a state of national emergency, necessitating the mobilisation of the Army Reserve to man the beaches and making Herald Sun subscriptions compulsory.

Last Sunday we published a picture to help you identify these people, and help you to be very very scared. See Boat blast! Asylum seekers: the sequel!


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